I watched the cutest video today. It’s a viral video of a mother finding out she’s having a daughter… after having six sons!
So funny! In all honestly… I totally cried when I watched this. Such a happy mama!
Then I began to read some of the comments on many of the social shares of this video. Bad. Very bad. Never read the comments, right? I wish I could follow that rule! I would be much less depressed about the state of humanity if I did not read Facebook comments. There were many nasty comments from ignorant trolls about the size of their family and… as always… female bashing.
“When that girl is 16 they’re gonna wish it had been a boy”
“Boys are so much easier than girls.”
“I have two teenage daughters… so good luck to her! Haha!”
“I’d rather have boys! Girls are tough to raise!”
If only these feelings were expressed nowhere other than by random wack-a-doo’s on Facebook. But no. I hear these things all the time. Girls are really hard to raise and cause their parents so much more trouble than boys. Two sons are easier than one daughter. Blah blah blah.
I do have some questions…
1. Since when is anything amazing in life “easy”?
The best things in life require work. Daughters and sons included.
2. Have I missed something here? Teenage boys never do anything stupid?
3. Why is it okay and actually considered funny when mothers, aka WOMEN, insult their own daughters? One mom will joke about her daughters attitude and the other mom will laugh and say “well, that’s a girl for you!”
Stop it. Just STOP.
What is my girl thinking when she hears me actually insult her and laughing? What does that do to her? What expectations have I just created for the way she behaves? What damage have I done to her self respect? How is her opinion of her own gender altered by my verbalizing unfair stereotypes? How is her trust in me and respect for me changed as I flippantly imply that it would be easier for me if she was different than who she is (as in, not female)?
Here’s what it boils down to: I love having a daughter. I cannot believe I’m so lucky to have her. She’s my girl. I’m crazy about her. I want her to know how special she is and that I will always love her no matter what. Sometimes her actions may not be great, but she’ll always be my girl. She’s mine and I’ll stand by her.
Today we cuddled in bed after naptime (yay for the occasional nap!) and took silly selfies. She held my hand and said to me “mommy, you’re my best friend!”
Having a boy could not possibly be better than this.
If you have only sons, it’s wonderful. If you have only daughters, it’s wonderful. If you have both, it’s wonderful. You’re not more of a woman if you produce a male child. You’re not less of a woman if you have no daughters. Love the life you live and love the people you share it with.